~ Husitka's Diary ~

New year, new start.

I realise it sounds like a terrible cliché but that's how I've been feeling since 2012 started, and I'm still oddly excited about it. I've worked quite hard on customising a new theme for my blog here on Blogger (adding custom icons, adding bullets to the categories, adding an About section with a custom-created avatar and some information about myself, reorganising the footer), I joined Pinterest and Tumblr (so of course I had to customise my Tumblr theme as well ;-) ) and I still need to work on my flagship site Husitka.com because I'm planning on turning it into my main online residence. :-)

I might also help revamp the RockSaltJournals website (being one of the admins there and whatnot). :-)

Of course I still need to work on my art and shops more so that I'm finally able to make my dream of becoming a full-time artist and graphic designer come true so there's definitely a lot of work ahead but this time, it makes me excited, not scared. 

And here's to hoping that my blog presence here will be much more regular in 2012, too. :-D

Yes, it's been a long time since I last posted something here. My original plan was to start posting regularly, to find more people to connect and read my blog and to work on my art and online promotion more.

There's something beautiful about planning. The vision of something you want to do, something that gives you a goal you can work on, something that gives you hope, that gives your life meaning even if you had been feeling like crap only a few minutes before you started planning.

I LOVE plans. I LOVE writing them down in a notepad or into a brand new Excel sheet (because it lets me check the finished ones and keep track of the ones still ahead of me). So far, so good. But... OF COURSE THERE'S A "BUT"! My "but" (no spelling error, there should be only one T, thank you very much) is that I get discouraged very often. For the smallest of the reasons. It might be because I have a soul of an artist, and those are very critical towards themselves. Everything or nothing. Being a perfectionist doesn't help much. I can't even remember how many plans ran through my mind, how much paper I covered with my hopes and expectations, and how many times I found THE REASON not to do something. My favourite one is: "I'm not good enough. I'm not as good as others."

If you think this attitude of mine has been born because of an unsupportive family or "bad" friends, I can assure you that you're wrong. My family might have some flaws but they always support me in the end. The same goes to my friends. I even think they know what I'm capable of doing much better than I've ever known, myself. Where I see INSUFFICIENT, they see GOOD, GREAT or even EXCELLENT. If you ever meet one of my friends, they might even start convincing you I'm a real Renaissance man, well, woman. I can't tell you if they're right or wrong because firstly, I have serious problems judging myself objectively, finding my own value, and secondly, because I have always suspected them of "being nice" towards me.

Why am I writing all this? Because there's been another PLAN that came after someone I deeply care about, someone I utterly trust and someone who has helped me overcome even my worst depressions had told their partner a story about not being afraid, a story that touched the very deep soul of their partner and me alike.